I have managed to make new friends at work which is nice. I'm new to the whole East Coast vibe, since I grew up on the West Coast and have been living in Europe for the last six years. So it is difficult at times to relate to the East Coast "thing."
But I have really been making an effort. I am a really good listener, so mostly I just let people talk at me and I nod my head in agreement. This seems to be working. I have now become (although I am MALE and not gay) the BEST GIRLFRIEND of one of my female colleagues. She gossips with me about office stuff, her kid, and her love life. I smile and insert various 'ooo's, 'ohmigosh'es, and 'no way's as appropriate.
To make a long story short, she had been dating this guy I'll call JERRY (so as to keep his actual identity anonymous and save him from any undo embarrassment).
At first, my BEST GIRLFRIEND was totally in love with this wonderful guy JERRY. All I heard was JERRY this and JERRY that. She was all 'he's so special. Omigod! He's even wealthy!' She made sure I understood that his financial status was TOTALLY unimportant of course. Then she was all 'and he is so good looking. Omigoodgollydammit. He's like a total babe. And sexy? Forget about it!' Which I understood to mean that JERRY actually WAS sexy, not that I should 'forget about it' in the literal sense. Also, she wanted to make clear to me that LOOKS don't mean a damn to her. That it was not important what a guy looked like, it was what's in his heart. But 'Omideargodinheaven' is he a hunk. (I am paraphrasing all these comments. I more trying to convey the overall excitement my BEST GIRLFRIEND was feeling. No one actually says 'Omigoodgollydammit' of course.
So anyway, time moves on (two weeks). They start looking at houses together, they plan vacations together (I'm not making this up). It's all happening so fast. 'I think I'm falling in love with JERRY. Omig...(you get the idea).
Meanwhile, my BEST GIRLFRIEND is sent to Israel for a business meeting. Honestly, I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP. A week goes by. She comes back. Suddenly, no mention of JERRY. All her gossip becomes centred around the office. A few weeks go by. I get to wondering 'what happen with OMIGOD JERRY?' Wasn't he the most wonderful man anyone had ever met? So I asked her about it.
'What happened to JERRY?'
Whoops! I have to go to a meeting...more in an hour.
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